Single in Sitcom Land
Isn’t it interesting how society in general shoves the “happily ever after (via marriage)” goal down the throats of women and it starts in childhood? Yet, when you watch television shows like The Andy Griffith Show, nearly everyone seemed to be happily single. The married character (Otis) was the town drunk. This synopsis goes to show that happiness is not achieved through romance and marriage. Fast forward to Who’s the Boss? during the 1980’s and early 90’s. Angela and her live-in housekeeper, Tony had this ongoing sexual tension throughout the entire series. They came close to getting married during the show’s final season. Disappointingly, they did not get married and at the end of the final episode, Tony comes back as Angela’s housekeeper.
In Gilligan’s Island, the only married couple was the millionaire and his wife. None of the other shipwrecked characters was married. If anyone remembers this show from the 1960’s, there was sexual tension between some of the single characters. When I watched this show in syndication, I was in preschool and early elementary school and I could sense an attraction between the geeky Gilligan and Ginger, the sexy movie star. I also thought the Professor and good girl-next-door Mary Ann made a perfect match. Why would I even think about that at such a young age? Again, the whole happily-ever-after goal was subliminally showed down my throat.
During Laverne & Shirley, both the main characters were single throughout most of the series, with a few short-lived relationships. At the beginning of the final season, Shirley was married off and never seen again. Even though the actress who played Shirley chose to leave the series, I wouldn’t be surprised if having her character married and on the show would take away the original purpose of Laverne & Shirley as well as lower ratings. While this show was made during the latter part of the 1970’s and early 1980’s, the setting took place during the 1950’s and 60’s. In that era, the majority of women were married during their 20’s, which was not the case for the two main characters. A show about single women who are best friends, as well as roommates, would not have existed during the 1950’s. Usually, women at that time who were single, lived at home with their parents. If they weren’t married by the age of 25, they were deemed as old maids. Apparently, both characters were pushing 30 near the end of the series.
That Girl (1966-1971) and The Mary Tyler Moore Show (1970-1977): Both were sitcoms about women who had not yet been married. In That Girl, Marlo Thomas portrays a single woman who is an aspiring actress. This is the first show to portray a single woman who is not a domestic or living with her parents. Thomas’ character does have a boyfriend. They get engaged near the end of the series, but don’t marry. According to an interview with Thomas, the decision for the couple not to marry was hers because “she did not want to send a message to young women that marriage was the ultimate goal for them, and she worried that it would have undercut the somewhat feminist message of the show” ("THAT GIRL on The Web: Interviews with Marlo Thomas" Archived December 13, 2006, at the Wayback Machine). The Mary Tyler Moore Show began with Mary as a single 30-year-old career woman who moves to Minneapolis after a broken engagement. This series created two spinoffs about Rhoda, another single woman, and Phyllis, who left the series as a recent widow.
The Golden Girls is about four gorgeous senior citizens living in Florida. Because I was a child during the show’s run from 1985-1992, my mother thought the show was too mature for me and having to listen to women my grandmother’s age talk about their sex lives did not appeal to me and still doesn’t. These women, who all had adult children, were single again for various reasons: divorce and widowhood. There were a few serious relationships that didn’t last. On the series’ finale, one of the characters marries.
On Seinfeld, the four main characters were single and childless, though George almost got married. His fiancé died from licking the envelopes of their wedding invitations.
On Murphy Brown (1988-1998), most of the main characters were single. Murphy, who at the beginning of the series was over 40, raised her son as a single parent. Other shows about single mothers are Julia, Alice, One Day at a Time, Who’s the Boss, Kate & Allie, and Reba. The main ones I watched were Kate & Allie and Reba. These women portrayed the challenges of single parenting, yet they toughed out those challenges and did the best they could in raising their children, with or without the help of a man.
After knowing about and watching shows where most or all of the main characters are single makes me glad that I did not watch Everybody Loves Raymond. I saw bits and pieces of that show which was about the life and marriage of sports’ writer Ray Barone. I never knew who I felt sorrier for: his wife who had to deal with the constant meddling of Ray’s parents or Ray, who had to listen to Debra’s incessant nagging about the meddling parents, who lived next door and often came to the house unannounced. Those bits and pieces made married life seem unpleasant to me, though I was married to my first husband during part of the series. To watch that show reminded me too much of my overbearing mother-in-law so I preferred to watch other shows that were not geared toward married life.
As for the shows of today (many of which I don’t care to watch), many of them show lots of bed-hopping and relationship swapping between the characters. Think Grey’s Anatomy, Melrose Place, and Beverly Hills 90210. Due to society’s other belief, which contradicts the “find your happily-ever-after” goal, bed-hopping and relationship swapping seem to be the norm today, both in entertainment and real-life. Somehow, there’s always pressure to be in a relationship or at least to be pursuing one, both on television, in the movies, and in real life. Maybe that’s why I prefer older shows because there did not seem to be the emphasis on having someone to “complete you” (Gosh, I hated that Jerry Maguire movie).
As a single-again (divorced since 2002), single-again woman (broken engagement) in her early forties, syndicated shows of the past (as well as some in the present) give me a new perspective about singleness. It’s not so bad. Maybe, being single is better and after recently experiencing a broken engagement, I feel freer! I just want to throw my hat in the air like Marlo Thomas in That Girl and Mary Tyler Moore. Though the mature women on The Golden Girls seemed to have fun in spite of their heartaches, I hope I have someone to grow old with when I’m their age.
If my life were a sitcom, it would have a touch of The Golden Girls because I’m living with my widowed mother even though we are nothing like the characters. After being widowed for over five years, Mom still does not have any interest in dating. As for myself, I still need some me time, but eventually I would like to put myself out there and not remain single like a lot of the many singles in sitcom land.
For more information about shows with single people see: https://www.ranker.com/list/best-single-woman-sitcoms/ranker-tv
